As you could probably tell from my post yesterday I was stressed. Actually, I think that is an understatement. I was on the edge of throwing everything away, but something inside me kept fighting and I’m so glad it did!
The past few months have flown by but have also felt so long. I’ve had a hard few months, admittedly they’ve been great too – but I only ever seem to remember the worst, never the best! And yesterday was no exception.
A lot of good things happen yesterday; I saw my family, we won the award for ‘best house party’ for the music video we made in class, me and Nat supported each other with our work in a way we haven’t before, I managed to control my actions, but the things that stick out in my mind most are the negative.
Yesterday, I thought my chance at completeing my degree was over, not worth fighting for but today that all changed.
Today, out of nowhere I’ve been handed a miracle. Before it appears I’ve gone off track – I’m not religious, while I would love to think there is a God or a heaven, I don’t think there is. However, at times I do feel like there is someone or something looking out for people.
Everyone is guilty of moaning that they never get what they want in life, never be who they want to be, no one is ever happy with the luck they receive. Personally, I think that if you stop looking for luck and happiness (as cliche as it sounds) you realise it’s right there infront of you.
At the moment, if it wasn’t for my sister, I wouldn’t be happy right now. I wouldn’t feel like I’m helping people. I wouldn’t feel like I’m actually acomplishing something which I thought was to fail.
I spent the whole of yesterday researching Bell’s Palsy.
For my coursework we have to write a feature on a person or topic of our choice. My first person pulled out a couple of months back, then did my second, my third, and yesterday I found out that my idea had once again failed. Not out of choice, while I regret thinking this now, I decided to focus my feature on Bell’s Palsy and how it affects people.
My sister suffered with this twice when she was younger. Until today, I didn’t realsie the severeity of the condition and the way it impacts people’s lives.
Last night I emailed anyone and everyone I could find online. Charities (although there is only a couple), professionals, researchers, doctors – you name it, I emailed them. I honestly thought I had no hope. I thought it was all falling apart in front of me and that I had no chance of passing.
This monring things changed. I woke up to a reply. There is only one main charity set up for the condition and their founder replied instantly to my email, while they aren’t trained in the condition themselves they put a post online for volunteers to help me. The response was incredible. So many people were happy to talk to me about their conditions – I never expected this kind of response.
After this, a doctor also got back to me and offered some great advice. In the mean time, after dropping my situation into conversation with friends, people had took to finding contacts for me. Today really was a great day and to me it really was a miracle.
I honestly thought I had no chance, thought it was all falling apart but little did I know.
Yesterday if you had seen me I would have been a mess, crawled up in a ball on the floor not wanting to face the world. Today. Today is a new day. Today I stand proud, tall and confident. I want to help those who helped me. I want to spread awareness of Bell’s Palsy and support those who need my support.
Miracles happen to people each and every day, we’re all just too caught up in our lives to realise just what is going on.
Without the help of others I wouldn’t be where I am now, I just want to return that help and hopefully in time, that will encourage others to help people.
Without people we wouldn’t be human. Without people we wouldn’t have feelings, goals, dreams, friendship, hope.
Appreciate those around you, those that have stuck by you – they really are your own little miracle.